LOVE HEALS

People ask me all the time, sometimes sorrowfully, sometimes resolutely, always earnestly: “What do I need to do to heal this loss, this marriage, this child; this messed-up world?” These are profound questions I often wonder about. Since I’m in the business of healing, my clients’ questions are never far from my thoughts. But the other night while I slept, my unconscious wowed me by delivering a big dreamed-up answer.

In my dream I’m sitting at my computer and writing an article for Enjoy Whole Health magazine. My hands pause on the keys as I ask the question, “What heals?”

The answer which pops into my mind is simply and wisely spoken, “Love heals.”
“But of course”, I say to the Wise One who inhabited my dream mind. Then I pursue further understanding. “We all know that Love heals, but how?”

The Wisdom Figure explains. “Break it down. Make it simple. It goes something like this: L-O-V-E
Limit time with people whose values are at odds with your own
Open to Universal Truth
Value yourself as much as you value others
Empty yourself of judgment

Minding my manners, I thanked the Wisdom Figure for answering so promptly and clearly. The Wisdom Figure, also polite, had something else to say. “You’re welcome. Now do as you have heard.”

With morning sunshine streaming into my face I woke, grabbed for my journal and scribbled the dream. As I pondered the meaning I realized these were Rules for the Road: How to Enjoy Whole Health, and how to heal with L-O-V-E.

While dream messages are usually meant for the dreamer alone, I suspect the Wisdom Figure won’t mind that I share the message with you.

The word L-O-V-E as defined by the Wisdom Figure, and translated to convey life lessons, makes a whole lot of healing sense.  Clearly we weren't only talking about romantic love, or eros.  When I thought about the lessons I was learning, I realized that agape, or higher spiritual love for self and others is the foundation for any long-lasting relationship. 

Limit time with people whose values are at odds with your own.
This doesn’t indicate that we should entirely stay away from people whose values are different from our own. It suggests we “limit time” with them. Like the old adage says, “What is one man’s (or woman’s) pleasure is another man’s poison”.

Even so, limiting relationships means change, and change is difficult. Commitment to people we once considered our closest confidantes, devotion to a group whose values we once agreed with, and dedication to an organization which once claimed our loyalty, may disintegrate over time as we personally grow and transform. Hanging out with like-minded souls requires little effort, while struggling for common ground with ideological strangers takes a toll on the personality. Saying goodbye to a previous relationship form is hard, but sometimes essential for emotional well-being and peace of mind.

Open to Universal Truths
The American Constitution states that there are certain inalienable rights which we hold self-evident…the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

Universal truths are inherent in all the great religions of the world.

The Founding Faith of our American Fathers supposes that there are two great commandments on which hang all the law and the prophets: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and mind and soul and love your neighbor as you love yourself.

Buddhist belief suggests that every life has the purpose of achieving supreme happiness through total awareness of itself and of the universe. They suppose: What we are today comes from thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build on life of tomorrow; our life is the creation of the mind.

The Jewish Kabbalah proposes that all things are connected above and below. Therefore: If we understand this connection to all things then we tend to treat all things as if they are not separate from us and we feel compassion for all beings.

Value yourself as much as you value others. Ours is a co-dependent culture where placing personal needs second to the needs of others is the accepted standard. What if emergency oxygen mask directions onboard airplanes instructed to use the oxygen mask for others first, and then for ourselves? Nobody wins in this scenario. Only filled-up, lively people have anything to give.

Empty yourself of judgment. It’s a nasty truth: We become what we hate. While condemning others we poison our insides with disgust, and dredge deep neurological pathways of disdain. Peace is not achieved by imagining war. Let it go!

I often remember Scott Peck’s profound LOVE definition taken from The Road Less Traveled: "Love is the willingness to extend yourself for the spiritual good of yourself or another."

This dream inspires me to imagine universal healing for human kind. Are we listening to our own inner guidance, always focused towards unification of the spirits of men and women the world over? How hard will we work--as a person, as a nation, as a people-- to both love and be loved? On a good day our love is enough. I’m thinking we could use more good days about now.